I want to dedicate this blog to my family

I want to dedicate this blog to my partner Ray and my beautiful daughters Carley and Lucy without whose unconditional love and never ending support I would be lost. I love you all!

Friday, 19 August 2016


Well life has moved on and I'm not really sure where 3 years have gone since I last posted on my blog.  Feel a little bit sad that I've neglected it but on the plus side both my mental and physical health have been fairly good, despite a bout of pneumonia last year that I will blog about in a separate post.  Enbrel continues to work for me although  my neutrophil count remains low, I am told that this is now my new 'normal'.  My dose has been reduced to 25mg every 2 weeks which although its a small dose seems to be maintaining my 'remission'.  I am however slightly concerned about some of my joints on my hands that are still uncomfortable despite some recent steroid injections.

Now those of you who have followed my story will know I suffered a near fatal reaction to Sulfasalazine which has left me in fear of anything new medical, so I was dismayed to receive a letter a coupe of weeks ago telling me that I would now be receiving a 'Biosimilar' instead of my regular Enbrel delivery.  Now it doesn't take much to set off my anxiety that simmers under the surface of my everyday life so I tweeted 'Anyone else been told their meds are changing to bio silimar' hoping for some support and positivity and out of my 1770 followers one?  Really?  Only my dear friend Katrina responded and no she hasn' I stressed and researched and I know they say that they are as effective and as safe ....but how do they really know...they are 'similar' not 'the same' call me a pessimist but I feel safe on Enbrel, or as safe as I can on a medication that changes the chemistry of my body, lowers my immune system, leaves wounds harder to heal, increases my risk of cancer just to name a few. I understand that with the licencing of these new drugs which will be more cost effective the doors will open for many more people to have access to drugs that may change their lives and for that I am grateful, but I'm not brave, I struggle with the drugs I already take but have come to 'understand' them, I don't want to change, but it appeared I had no choice.

So with rising anxiety and an appointment with my rheumatologist approaching I started my campaign to 'remain' on Enbrel .  Hallelujah.... I uncovered the fact that the biosimilar only come in 50mg and as my dose is a 25mg appears I am 'safe' for now. Please nobody take this personally I've been through a lot in my life and I feel like at the moment I'm on a plateau, of sorts, and I'd like to stay there.  I will of course continue to watch and listen and hope that my probably irrational fears are unfounded and the efficiency and safety of these new drugs will be proven with time.

Now on a plus note and a completely different subject since starting this blog I have added to my family with another Chihuahua, Rosie who is now 2 and just about to adopt a street dog from Spain....mad ? ...probably.....I have agonised over this decision...if you are interested you can read about her, my usual anxiety fuelled thoughts and this new journey over on ....

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